CogHere2Serve
August 12, 2022
Est. Reading: 5 minutes

What's the difference between lust and love? I want to understand my emotions

Know the difference between Lust and Love

When it comes to others, we can usually tell whether they feel lust or love for someone. However, when it comes to ourselves, it's never straightforward. We can't tell the difference between the trees and the wood. Are we really in love or just trying to satisfy our animal needs?

The saying goes that love is blind, but this also applies to lust. We are blind to any flaws in the object of our affections, but when we are high on lust, we can also be blind to signs that what we are feeling is not genuine; It might all fade after one night.

Love is a strong feeling for another person. It's a long-lasting attraction that goes deeper than the surface, develops into emotional attachment, and lives forever.

On the other hand, lust is a physical attraction that leads to an overwhelming feeling of sexual desire resulting from a hormonal surge.

 

While lust may develop into love and is often referred to as the first stage of love, this is not always the case. Sometimes once those sexual desires are satisfied, they look for another body to attach to.

If you're having butterflies in your stomach and aren't sure if what's causing them is true love or just sexual chemistry with no natural substance (though no guarantee won't grow with time), here are the main differences between love and lust.

It will take some time.

I'm sorry to say it, but love, at first sight, does not exist.

Of course, love can strike at first sight. When they kiss you, you may feel something vital like lightning, and you can feel your heart eager to speak. This is easily confused with love, mainly if the relationship develops.

True love, on the other hand, doesn't come that easy. To genuinely love someone, you must spend quality time with them and get to know them well. Putting your heart into someone's hand that easy and fast might end up in regret and heartbreak. Make sure you take your time and build the relationship on solid pillars, that way understanding your feelings would be much easier.

You'd like to cuddle your partner and wake up by their side.

While you will have a lot of sexual desire for someone you love, you'll still want to stay with them after you've had sex to cuddle and talk. Sex would be a way of expressing your love towards them, and cuddling would get high in a healthy way 😉

You may have to rush off to work the following day, but what you want is to have a leisurely breakfast with your lover.

 

You are aware that they are not flawless.

We know that no one is perfect, but we can quickly lose sight of when hormones and desire blind us. When you lust after someone, you have an idealized image of them and don't see them for who they are.

When a relationship is just getting started, we all tend to present an idealized version of ourselves. You can't get under someone's skin unless you put in the effort.

 

As you get to know someone, their guard comes down, and they begin to show their true colors. Only then do you begin to see them for who they are.

 

This can bring an end to a blossoming relationship, implying that it never progresses beyond the lust stage, or it can allow it to develop and evolve into true love. When you love someone, you are aware of their flaws and choose to love them no matter what. Sometimes even their flaws make you feel even more profound.

You can't stop thinking about them.

Lust can do this to us as well. You'll spend all of your time fantasizing about them, but you'll be daydreaming about the physical aspects of the relationship or their physical characteristics.

However, Those in love will be unable to get the other person off their minds as well, so they will be more likely to be caught daydreaming about something witty to tell them, maybe how would you make them smile next time you see them.

That is not to say that their minds will be wholly pure or that they will not experience flashbacks to the physical side of things, but they will not be the primary focus.

 

You want to spend the whole night talking.

Two people in love will comfortably stay up all night enjoying each other's company, but it won't be the stimulating sexual conversation that keeps them awake.

Two people in love are equally interested in each other's minds as they are in each other's bodies. When they are just talking to each other, they can quickly lose track of time.

They never run out of topics to talk about, and even though they don't agree on everything, they are fascinated by each other's minds. However, don't feel pressured to keep the conversation going. It's usually fine to feel like talking or losing words. Your presence might be more than enough.

 

You Wish To Meet Those Who Are Important To Them

You'll be interested in seeing the source of your desire, but you won't be interested in meeting their network of family and friends.

 

Love, on the other hand, implies a desire to learn about all aspects of that person. For example, you can learn a lot about someone they hang out with and who they consider to be family and close friends. If things get serious, their family will most likely become an essential part of your life.

If you're in love, you'll want to form relationships with these people as well. You can see it as an essential part of growing your relationship with your partner. You don't have to love their entourage if you can't get along. However, since you love your partner, you should be super respectful to them.

In return, you'll be thrilled and proud to introduce them to your closest friends and family, and you'll be hoping that they'll love your new partner almost as much as you do.

 

It's All About Science

A recent study attempted to elucidate what occurs in the brain when we experience sexual desire and love. It demonstrated that, despite their close relationship, they activate different striatum regions, a part of the brain.

Things that give us immediate pleasure, such as food and sex, light up the region associated with desire. On the other hand, love is connected to another region involved in a conditioning process in which we begin to assign value to the things we associate with pleasure or reward.

Love will grow if our sexual desires are constantly rewarded with pleasurable feelings. That's why you don't fall in love right away. Instead, our emotions move from one region of the striatum to another as we transition from lust to love.

 

On a fundamental level, and without sounding too depressingly un-romantic, love is simply a habit that we create when our sexual desires are satisfied.

The same area of the brain is linked to drug addiction. Anyone who has ever gone a little crazy in love will understand. Let's face it, and people love a beautiful drug! And it's OK to get addicted to it.

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